Tag: Chicken
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comments feedOpinion: If You Can Avoid Eating Bones, Fried Chicken is Pretty Tasty
By Stan Bargmeyer, life-long Coma resident and Coma News Intern
Fried chicken is a pretty good food to eat, especially if you avoid eating the bones.
I just try my best to eat around the bones. If I can manage to do that, I find I actually kind of enjoy eating fried chicken.
I avoided eating the popular food for years following several near-death experiences as a younger man.
It used to be that I would just eat all of the fried chicken and sharp pieces of bone would get stuck in my throat and I’d almost die. It was my fear of dying and dislike for the taste of bones that made me give up fried chicken, entirely.
Recently, my friends encouraged me to give fried chicken another chance and they went to great lengths to explain that the bones were not, in fact, edible. With great reservations, I gave chicken another chance and had encouraging results.
It was a little clumsy at first and I only really nibbled around the edges because I didn’t want to eat the bone. But with some practice, I got the hang of it and decided it was pretty decent, as far as food goes.
My recent success with fried chicken has inspired me to reconsider other foods I stopped eating or never tried because I thought they were dangerous or too exotic or just not the type of food people like me would eat. But now I think I want to try those things. Like pancakes.
News In Brief- May 15
By Coma News Staff
NO CHARGES FOR FIGHTING CHICKEN
Authorities announced this week that Gary, the fighting chicken recently involved in an attack on director Shane Darvis, will not face criminal charges.
The chicken viciously attached the director during the first all-animal rendition of the famous Greek comedy, “Lysistrata” on April 28.
“It is a sad day for Coma when a criminal like Gary is allowed to fly free,” Darvis said from his couch where he is still recovering from multiple scratches. “I guess he really didn’t fly free. He walked. Or waddled? Strutted?”
MAYOR REASSURES CITIZENS ‘LORD OF THE RINGS’ “CAN NOT HAPPEN HERE”
Mayor Dave Anderson addressed local media this week in an effort to assuage concerns regarding the possibility that events from the popular film series “Lord of the Rings” could happen in Coma.
“There is no evidence that any of the stuff portrayed in those films could happen in our town,” Anderson said. “The things in those movies took place thousands and thousands of years ago.”
TEEN UNVEILS CONTROVERSIAL ECONOMIC PLAN
After days of research and late nights, Coma teen, Chase Donovan, unveiled a highly controversial worldwide economic plan in his fourth period Current Events class this week.
According to Donovan, the solution to world poverty and hunger is to make currency a free commodity so that people had money to purchase food, water and video games.
“Think about it, if money were free to everyone, there would be no need for people to go without money,” Donovan said. “Just have a place where people can go and get as much as they want.”
MAYOR ANNOUNCES NEW WEATHER REPORTING SYSTEM
Coma Mayor Dave Anderson announced this week that in an effort to ensure 100 percent accurate weather reports, the town would implement a new post-weather reporting system. The system will report the weather after-the-fact to provide citizens with a 100 percent accurate weather report.
“No more guess work,” Anderson said. “With this new system, you will know precisely what the weather was yesterday. It’s THAT accurate.”
