Tag: advice

Life Hacks Volume I

by Stan Bargmeyer

There are a lot of things I have discovered over the years that make my life easier. Small, simple tips that can help you be happier and make life just a little more enjoyable. I want to share some of these “life hacks” with you. Maybe, like me, you weren’t aware. But that’s okay. Now you are.

How to quickly capitalize a letter or word while typing. This one comes in handy if you want to write sentences that use proper capitalization. There are two ways to do this. First, there is a button on most standard keyboards called “Shift.” If you hold this button down while typing a letter, the letter becomes a capitol letter! If you want to write in all caps, there is another button called “Caps Lock”. If you press that button, you will write in ALL CAPS. JUST LIKE THIS! To disarm this function, simply click the “Caps Lock” button a second time and you return to normal.

life hacks caps

How to repair and extend the life of damaged prescription eyewear. I have had to learn this little trick over time as I’ve been a prescription glasses-wearing person for years now. The secret to this little life hack is Scotch tape. I’m not joking! Take some Scotch tape and tape the glasses back together. Use it liberally to ensure it holds. Your glasses will be like new!

life hacks eyewear

How to make chocolate snack stand displays. If I’m hosting guests I like to make them feel welcome and find that these easy-to-make chocolate snack stand displays really do the trick. You just take one of those power adapter thingies from a smart phone, set it on its end and tuck a square of chocolate between the “prongs”. I hope that’s not too technical. This is a cute and clever way to add some fun to your next party or when hosting company.

life hacks chocolate stand

 

Queries and Quislings

Queries and Quislings is an advice dispensary offered as a public service of Coma News Daily and the advice is written by Coma News Daily publisher Davis Montgomery III.

Dear Query Guy,

How do I get that place called Vine to come and film me? I have some really funny ideas for stories but I need someone to film me. How do other people get their videos up there? I’ve called and emailed Vine and can’t get them to respond.

Sincerely Funny

 

Query Guy:

The subtle vagaries that guide men’s selection of leisure time activities are shot through with an almost infinite variety of permutations and depredations. My initial response to your query is to urge extensive reflection on the nature of man and his place in the universe before broaching an extensive exploration of what Vine is. Is it quite possible that you are not funny and no one wants to see your video. My exploration of Vine has proven that there are more people willing to film themselves than there are people with actual talent.

But I also recall the frequent and enthusiastic advice of my dearest spouse in such delicate circumstances: Hit it with a hammer. Don’t think about it and don’t wait. Just hit that problem with a hammer and hit it good. A hammer will fix anything including all of your problems. It will even fix the fact that you are not funny.
hit it with a hammer front page

If you have any questions about this advice it is only because you have failed to hit the problem hard enough and often enough with a hammer. This advise is so clear and concise that I am copying most of what I said to the querying woman last week.

Good luck to you, sir.
QG

Queries and Quislings

Queries and Quislings is an advice dispensary offered as a public service of Coma News Daily and the advice is written by Coma News Daily publisher Davis Montgomery III.

 

Dear Query Guy,
Is it normal for my husband to crochet? Recently he’s started crocheting in public and it’s very awkward especially since he’s the Sheriff and supposed to be tough. He’s made some incredible doily’s and he’s working on an afghan but everyone is looking at him. Recently someone threw yarn bombs on our lawn. Not sure what to do. Please help.

avatar

Sincerely, Tied in Knots in Coma

 

Query Guy:

The subtle vagaries that guide men’s selection of leisure time activities are shot through with an almost infinite variety of permutations and depredations. My initial response to your query is to urge extensive reflection on the nature of man and his place in the universe before broaching an extensive exploration of your husbands foibles and proclivities.

But I also recall the frequent and enthusiastic advice of my dearest spouse in such delicate circumstances: Hit it with a hammer. Don’t think about it and don’t wait. Just hit that problem with a hammer and hit it good.
hit it with a hammer front page
If you have any questions about this advice it is only because you have failed to hit it hard enough and often enough with a hammer.

Good luck to you, madam.
QG