The following is Serious, part of a year-long investigative series by Coma News Daily into the disappearance of a former editor, Don Johnson Michaels.
by Jonny Reynolds, reporter, who is not Ryan Reynolds and does not have social phobia
About one month after Don Johnson Michaels was last seen riding away from the barn where he was living a curious thing happened.
Don Johnson Michaels is editor of Coma News Daily and works on my farm for free on the weekend as part of his compensation package at the newspaper.
The town hired a local private detective/relationship blogger to investigate.
What became of her investigation and why did the town take that unorthodox step? Serious sat down with the detective, Marybell Davis, to find out.
Serious: Who hired you to find this missing person and why?
Marybell: Sheriff Paul T. Frostnib hired me. But because people might think it was weird we pretended I was hired by the mayor, since most people already think he’s an idiot.
Serious: And why did the sheriff want you?
Marybell: I have a very particular set of skills acquired over a long period of time: blogging about mysteries.
Serious: Criminal mysteries?
Marybell: Life’s mysteries.
Serious: Fascinating. What did you learn about this particular mystery?
Marybell: I learned that “After great pain, a formal feeling comes.”
Serious: Was that code?
Marybell: No, that was Emily Dickinson.
Serious: So you consulted literature?
Marybell: That’s where I started. But I also googled pictures of the guy.
Serious: Michaels?
Marybell: Yeah. Tragic face. There were also pictures of the sad little room he lived in at that guy’s barn.
Serious: He lived in one of the stables on the estate of his boss, Davis Montgomery III, publisher of Coma News Daily.
Marybell: Right. Really nice Snapchat pics for that place and the horses.
Serious: So what else did you learn?
Marybell: If you miss someone and stand out in the cold for a long time watching them you are going to get frostbite.
Serious: I’m sorry, I meant what did you find out about Michael’s disappearance?
Marybell: Oh, I can’t talk about that. It’s an ongoing investigation.
Serious: But that’s why we asked you here.
Marybell: I thought you wanted to know about my blog.
Serious: So the fog of mystery surrounding the editor closes again.
Next time on Serious: Who were Michaels’ friends, what do they think happened to him, and how has his disappearance affected their view of themselves?
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