Queries and Quislings

Queries and Quislings is an advice dispensary offered as a public service of Coma News Daily and the advice is written by Coma News Daily publisher Davis Montgomery III.


Dear Query Guy,
Is it normal for my husband to crochet? Recently he’s started crocheting in public and it’s very awkward especially since he’s the Sheriff and supposed to be tough. He’s made some incredible doily’s and he’s working on an afghan but everyone is looking at him. Recently someone threw yarn bombs on our lawn. Not sure what to do. Please help.


Sincerely, Tied in Knots in Coma


Query Guy:

The subtle vagaries that guide men’s selection of leisure time activities are shot through with an almost infinite variety of permutations and depredations. My initial response to your query is to urge extensive reflection on the nature of man and his place in the universe before broaching an extensive exploration of your husbands foibles and proclivities.

But I also recall the frequent and enthusiastic advice of my dearest spouse in such delicate circumstances: Hit it with a hammer. Don’t think about it and don’t wait. Just hit that problem with a hammer and hit it good.
hit it with a hammer front page
If you have any questions about this advice it is only because you have failed to hit it hard enough and often enough with a hammer.

Good luck to you, madam.

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