How to Break Up, Get Back With, Break Up and Get Back With Your Ex Using Facebook

By Marybell Davis 25 years old, amazing life lived, awesome blogger of awesome things

It happened again!! LOL!! The same guy you’ve been dating and not dating and dating has broken up with you again.

It shocks me every time I hear this happen to someone else (this never happens to me I am popular LOL).

My sister Anna is married (we all should be!!! we are amazing!!!!) and has kids (how you tie the man down and to child support if you can’t tie him down!!!!!!!!) told me that if a guy leaves you and then gets back with you and then breaks up with you and then comes back and then breaks up with you again he’s probably not the right guy because he doesn’t love you!! LOL!!

Not true. He just doesn’t UNDERSTAND you are the right girl for him even though it’s not working and he doesn’t understand what love is. Love is when you win.

It’s your job to force LOVE and make him understand!

This doesn’t happen to me, mind you, but this has happened to other people I know and that’s why I am blogging to you about it. FML!!!!

lovAn actual rubber band is pictured above. No fingers were injured while taking this photo.

The best way to make him understand that he loves you and he doesn’t realize he loves you, besides stalking him, is to put everything out on Facebook. Here are some tips-

1) Post your pain. Whether it’s a saying written by someone else because you don’t have time to come up with your own sayings or if it’s to post a picture of the bag he made you wear when he was having sex with you. Whatever it takes post your pain without saying it’s your pain but infer it by posting it along with pictures of him. Don’t be honest ever because this isn’t about being honest or having a good relationship. This is about winning!!!

2) Pretend you like everything he is into. Whatever you do DO NOT find your own life. This is key. The way you make a guy love you is by being everything he wants you to be– into football, any sports he likes, the bands he likes, into threesomes. That’s right. Pretend. Once they marry you you can spend the rest of your life letting them know you aren’t the person they thought you were.

3) Only move on to make him jealous. You are in this to win (win=love) someone who doesn’t really want you in the first place. Go all in. Everything you do. Everything you post is about you trying to make him like you. It doesn’t matter if he’s actually the one for you. All you want to do is win someone who doesn’t love you in the first place. Make sure you are always there for him as his doormat, though. No matter how many times he uses you and moves on and calls it being indecisive. You be there waiting because this is how you win!!!

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4) Do not unfriend him on facebook. The difficulty becomes what to do if he doesn’t have a facebook? If he doesn’t have a facebook you keep his family as friends so that they can see how amazing your life is and how perfect you are for him when you pretend to like what he likes!!

Make sure you give this your all to win back a guy who will probably break up with you again.

Remember– dating isn’t about what is right and working it is about winning and getting the guy that everyone likes to choose you so he can break up with you. Why spend time trying to find someone who works well with you when you can spend countless hours forcing something that will never work? There are so many men in this world but you only want this one so you can beat all the other girls.

Tune in next week for “people talk” where I tell you verbatim about how amazing people are because they were in my life and wear the right kind of clothes.

For now, Mr. Green Jeans my baby cat, stained the carpet again. FML!!!!

Here’s the best quote I didn’t write but will cut and paste today: “Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.” — Richard Jeni

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