Disco ‘Blob’ Injures Six

By Coma News Staff
Six Coma residents were treated for minor injuries received during a pre-Fourth of July Coma summer concert series performance.
Trouble began at the disco-themed performance by Save the World, which was the fourth in a summer-long series the band has planned on the Coma Town Commons, when lead singer Dave Anderson fell on the stage while wearing pair of 10-inch platform shoes.

It is clear that Mayor Dave Anderson can no longer navigate a stage in platform shoes and possibly causes a public safety issue when wearing them.
“When the singer fell the other band members and the crew tried to help him up they all started falling on top of each other in a big pile in the middle of the stage,” said Jax Owen, who attended the concert. “Then things started getting really smokey and clothes started flying out into the crowd.”
The “strobe light-emitting smoke ball” began growing and groaning as an auto- disco beat reverberated across the town commons, according to another witness, Dee Collins. Families with young children were the first to flee the scene, followed more slowly by older residents whose walkers and wheelers struggled through the Common’s turf.
Teenagers and a smattering of young adults were inexplicably drawn toward the “amorphous blob of despair” shortly before emergency services personnel arrived.
What happened in the ‘disco ball’ was a time of exploration and discovery but I’m a little hazy on the details,” said Anderson, who has taken a summer hiatus from his mayoral duties to perform in Save the World. “Am I proud of those events? Well, it was certainly essential to our development as a band and as people.”

It's fun to play at the YMCA until it becomes a giant strobe light of flailing bodies.

It’s fun to stay at the YMCA until it becomes a giant strobe-lit smokey ball of flailing bodies.

“I went to a WARP tour show once and some crazy things happened at night under the stars that left you looking for your Vans and feeling kind of dead inside,” said Sadie Cracker who was working at her coffee shop near the Commons where refugees took shelter. “Thank God I grew out of that phase.”

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