Boomer Knows Best is an advice dispensary offered as a public service of Coma News Daily and the advice is written for those super confused and constantly failing “other generations” that don’t get “it”.
By Bob and Allie Smith-Smith
Hello, and welcome to the inaugural column by the Smith-Smiths!
As two long-time residents of Coma, we have gotten so much from this town.
We met as young idealistic flower children when we moved to Coma as part of the prestigious federal Teaching how to Apply for Benefits program.
But Coma’s summer of STIs in 1969 couldn’t last forever and eventually we had to get teaching jobs in the local public schools and settle down.
That’s when we got married and started a family. Together we raised three perfect children, launched a local business (Bob’s Mart!), became elected leaders (School Board for Allie and Town Council for Bob), and eventually divorced. Bob has since remarried.
And now that we’ve stepped back from our elected duties we realized that we are two divorced people who together have so much to give back. More importantly, we’ve found that there’s a huge unmet need for our insight and guidance–especially among our adult children, the Gen Xers. They’re sadly incapable of parenting or marriage, financially supporting their families, or pretty much anything else.
But no fear, Coma. Help has arrived and will be freely offered through this column. So, feel free to write and ask for our advise. And if you don’t, we’ll provide it anyway!
Until then, like us hippies used to say, question your authority over yourself!